Home Sweet Home?

I've been home for about 4 days now, and I can't shake this weird "funk" that I'm in. Being at camp, life is so easy. I was surrounded by godly men, women, and students for 15 days. I was covered in prayer before I even woke up most mornings and more than I will probably ever know. I started every morning praying with one of my closest friends. I spent all day, every day engaging in deep, meaningful, spiritual conversations and growing in my faith. We started and ended every single day with a time of worship that was always incredible and powerful. For 2 weeks, I was totally and completely focused on God and not on a single thing of this world. It was literally my job to focus on Him. How cool is that?! Of course, camp always has to come to an end, but for some reason adjusting to real life has been so hard. Church on Sunday was really wonderful. Mr. Steve did this awesome thing where he integrated worship and the message, which was about worship. Like I said, it was wonderful, but I looked around at everyone and just wanted to shake them and scream, "what's wrong with you?!" I absolutely love my church with all my heart, but where is the passion? Where is the happiness and the joy? I just feel like most people just don't get it. And most of our parents' generation was taught that you just stand there and sing and that's all there is to it, and I understand that it's hard to get out of that when it's what you've always been taught, but I just feel like there is so much more to it than that and that God doesn't care how we worship. That being said, some people genuinely worship like that, and I am all for that, but can you maybe just smile a little? I guess I just wish that all of church could be like camp, and maybe that's unrealistic of me. At least I can still rock out in my room or my car by myself. Being out of the real world for so long just makes me see how sad it really is.

Of course Timmy is still in Costa Rica, too, and I promise to try not to talk about it too much. I want him there because that's where he wants to be and where God wants him right now, but I miss him so much. I haven't had a real conversation with him in over 2 weeks, and that sucks. Anytime anyone asks, I just keep saying "this just isn't how it's supposed to be" The good thing is that this will make him being at Liberty in the fall no big deal because at least then we are in the same country and I can talk to him.

If home is where the heart is

Then my home is where you are

But it's getting oh so hard

To spend these days

Without my heart