Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Cast all your cares on the Lord and He will sustain you; He will never let the righteous fall. Psalm 55:22
God is our refuge and our strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Psalm 46:1
Surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid. The Lord, the Lord is my strength and my song; He has become my salvation. Isaiah 12:2 (I like how it says "the Lord" twice. like in case you didn't get it the first time, here it is again. and He is the only source of strength. good stuff)
Come to me all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your soul. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30 (I just skimmed over this at first because I've heard it so many times, but it's a good one)
So do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. Matthew 6:34 Amen to that!
I left my eyes to the hills. Where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth. Psalm 121:1-2
An anxious heart weighs a man down. Proverbs 12:25
Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried.
Quietly, patiently, lovingly, He replied.
I pleaded, and I wept for a clue to my fate,
And the Master so gently said, "Child you must wait."
"Wait? You say wait?" my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers, I need to know why.
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?"
By faith I have asked, and I'm claiming your Word.
"My future, and all to which I can relate
Hangs in the balance, and you tell me "wait?"
I'm needing a 'yes', a go ahead sign,
Or even a 'no', to which I can resign.
And Lord, you have promised that if we believe,
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
And Lord I've been asking, and this is my cry
"I'm weary of asking, I need a reply!"
Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
As my Master replied once again, "You must wait,"
So I slumped in my chair; defeated and taut
And grumbled to God; "So I'm waiting, for what?"
He seemed then to kneel and His eyes met with mine
And He tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens, darken the sun,
Raise the dead, cause the mountains to run. "
All you see I could give,
And pleased you would be.
You would have what you want,
but you wouldn't know Me.
You'd not know the depth of My love for each saint;
You'd not know the power that I give to the faint.
You'd not learn to see through clouds of despair;
You'd not learn to trust, just by knowing I'm there.
You'd not know the joy of resting in Me,
When darkness and silence was all you could see.
"You would never experience that fullness of love
As the peace of My Spirit descends like a dove.
You would know that I give, and I save, for a start,
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart. "
"The glow of My comfort late in the night;
The faith that I give when you walk without sight;
The depth that's beyond getting just what you ask
From an infinite God who makes what you have last. "
And you never would know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that 'My grace is sufficient for thee'
Yes, your dreams for that loved one overnight could come true,
But the loss! if you lost what I'm doing in you.
"So be silent, my child, and in time you will see
That the greatest of gifts is to get to know Me.
And though oft' may My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all...is still...wait.
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Saturday, July 11, 2009
-wiping dirt out of my bed
-never being able to keep my hair straight
-checking every girl’s bed for bugs at night
-wearing a backpack for over half of my day
-mosquitoes. At one point I had 15 bug bites. I never get bug bites
-not being able to shut the door to the bathroom stall because my knees hit the door
-wearing shoes in the shower
-having to wear shoes even in the cabin
-being responsible for every action of 8 or 9 other people besides myself
-having dinner type meals for lunch. I can’t tell you how many times we said to each other, “can I just have a sandwich please?”
-having 1 shower for 10 girls
-showering in an area so small that it is nearly impossible to shave your legs
-feeling dirty 10 minutes after showering because the humidity and sand
-never wearing anything besides gym shorts and a t shirt. While this is comfy, it gets old, especially blue and white shirts for 2 weeks.
-wearing a name tag
-being hit on by high school boys because they think I'm 16
-waking up 9 girls in the morning
-making 9 girls go to bed every night
-counting to 9 at least 50 times a day to make sure everyone is there, and looking for the missing ones
Different groups went on a prayer walk every night, and I really didn’t want to go because I felt like it would cut into our huddle time, but God really took those feelings away quickly! He totally changed my group and changed my prayer life. In those moments, I felt God closer than I ever have before. Lindsey and I were able to pray for our girls’ schools, for their walk with Christ, for their purity, for their future husbands, and for their self esteem. Praying out loud doesn’t bother me at all, but the way I began praying when we were on our walk was different. I wasn’t timidly asking God to do something, I was fervently begging Him, knowing that He can do it! I really learned to be more confident in my prayers. I felt like He was standing there, giving me the words to say and telling me what to pray for these girls. And my girls really stepped it up too. They took the lead without even being asked and I am so thankful that they were able to experience God in the stillness of the woods like that. It brought us closer as a group and brought Linds and I closer. I feel like it really changed my prayer life dramatically.
Worship every night was incredible! I am a very passionate person anyways and I hate feeling confined or like I am being told how to worship. I don’t like to be still. I like to do whatever I want. I am passionate about Jesus and I don’t care who knows, and in those services, none of it mattered. You could stand up and jump on the chair if you wanted (which I did not want) and no one would care. It’s so rare and so incredible to be in that kind of environment. Some of my girls had never even experienced corporate worship like that before and were a little thrown off by all of our energy and jumping around and raising our hands and probably thought I was weird for a little bit, but by the end of the week they were loving it! When we sang Hosanna and we got to the part where it says “we’re on our knees”, they stopped for a minute and we all literally got on our knees. It’s so humbling to just stop and be face first in front of God in total awe of what He is doing. I love being in an environment without judgment, where I can sing and dance if I want and worship just as I please and I’m so glad my girls got to experience that too. The band was called “Hello August” and they were an incredible group of people. They were there for both weeks so we really got to know them well. They hung out with us all the time and prayed with us and were just awesome. The best thing was how Natalie (lead singer) always tied scripture into what she was singing about and really showed us her heart and what God was telling her. She was so genuine and transparent with us and it allowed us to be the same way with her.
If you want to know about the girls from week 1- huddle 16!-I will send it to you, but I would hate to have said something that would offend someone and one of them come across it on here off of my facebook or something. They were awesome though and it was so sad to see them leave! I was ridiculous to even worry that they would be anything less than awesome.
One day after dinner we were all sitting around a picnic table outside and saw a wedding. I am basically obsessed with Epworth by the Sea and kinda sorta really want to get married there one day. It was the sweetest little ceremony. Of course it led me to think about my wedding day and it was also the day we were talking about purity so I had really been praying about it a lot that day. I am so thankful that, when I am in her shoes, I will be able to say that I have kept my purity intact for my husband and what a glorious day that will be. It also opened a lot of doors for me to talk to the girls that night. It was such a beautiful thing and I can still see it so vividly in my mind. My mom says we can’t afford a “destination wedding”, but I hardly deem St. Simon’s as grounds to be classified as such.
Friday afternoon we all went out to eat together and then the people who weren’t staying for week 2 left. I must admit that I struggled to get to know people the first week because there were 50 huddle leaders. I don’t deal well with large groups like that. I am very much a small group of intimate relationships kind of person, so I was ready for week 2 where we would go from 500 kids and 50 leaders to 170 kids and 18 leaders. We were all so exhausted and just needed to rest, so they gave us the whole day to basically do whatever we wanted. Jessica came and picked me up and I spent the afternoon with her and her sweet boys. I needed that so much. It’s hard to be confined to such a small campus for so long. I was emotionally, physically, and spiritually worn out and needed to have some time with someone like her who just pours into me, encourages me, and rejuvenates me. Not to mention she let me use her shower. Oh man, I hadn’t felt that clean in over a week. I only got to spend a couple hours with her, but it made the world of a difference. When I got back to camp, we all went out to eat for Meg’s birthday. We ended up staying at the restaurant until almost 11:00 just talking and laughing. It was so rejuvenating to be with these people and build these relationships without having to worry about our kids and what they were doing. When we got back, Cissie, Lindsey, and I went into one of the buildings to get our stuff and move into a new cabin. We were greeted by giant cockroaches. Needless to say, I freaked out, but Lindsey and Cissie just started throwing tennis shoes at them. We say it was our first bonding moment that solidified our friendship between the 3 of us. I have never screamed and laughed so much before and we met a whole new side of Cissie. Ya know when you laugh so much that you get that feeling like there’s stuff in your throat? Sav and I call it “flim”. Well we definitely had a bad case of the flim, only it wasn’t gone the next morning. So began the sickness which came to be known as R12209, but more on that later.
So concludes week 1.
Huddle 16: Reesa, Lauren, Alexis, Karis, Kristen, Jessica, Sarah Beth, Elizabeth, and Kalli- you guys were amazing. I could not have asked for a better group. Thanks for thinking I'm actually kinda cool and loving to hang out with me. Don't forget that you are remarkably and wonderfully made, perfect and beautiful. I love you girls!